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  • Writer's pictureMindy McCarthy

Wishing Time Away

It is the end of another year, and I think we can all say that 2020 was not what we expected it to be. As this is the time to be thinking about holidays, I find myself wishing time would go by sooner. Anybody else?

Whether we are anticipating a break from work, time with family, certain foods that are associated with the holidays, etc., I think many of us can relate to wishing the holidays would get here sooner kind of like when we were kids waiting for Santa to come visit.

While it is certainly a good thing to have things that we are looking forward to (and showing gratitude for those things), I think the habit of wishing time away can get us into trouble.

With the new year rolling around, many of us will be setting new year’s resolutions, and the majority of these goals are usually related to creating some kind of habit whether it is a healthy habit to lose weight or a habit to help with stress relief like practicing mindfulness. When we set these goals, it is beneficial for us set goals along the way, especially if these goals are long-term ones. Sometimes, though, we can find ourselves wanting to rush time by and simply be at our goal already without having to go through the process.

While we are going through the process and working hard to get to our goal, the process and grit can be those times that you look back on and appreciate because it taught you something whether it was something about yourself or something that helped you continue moving forward. If you were able to snap your fingers and achieve your goal, you would miss the opportunity to grow and learn through the process.

I know you are probably reading those words and thinking, “Okay, Mindy, how do I appreciate the process in the moment?”

The truth is the process is what gives you the confidence you need to keep going and stay motivated, especially after you hit your long-term goal. If setting a goal was easy, what is going to keep you motivated to continue doing that habit or living that lifestyle or whatever your goal may have been? The hard work and how you got there is the best motivator for wanting to sustain the goal that you worked so hard to achieve.

In the process, learning how to develop your confidence in yourself and know that you are doing the right things are the best ways to continue moving towards your goals. Let’s say you set a goal of wanting to lose 50 pounds. Sometimes, you are not going to like what you see on the scale, and you may feel discouraged when you are not seeing results as quickly as your expectations were. However, if you continue to tell yourself that you are doing the right things, and you are developing the right habits to help you reach your goals, you gain confidence in yourself. You develop the power over your negative self-talk and the ability to talk back to these thoughts knowing that you are doing what you need to do, and the results will come as you trust the process.

The same can be said for skills that you are hoping to obtain for your particular sport. For example, if you are someone who wants to improve on your ball handling when it comes to playing basketball, having attempt after attempt of a specific move can seem tiring and worthless. However, the moment you begin flowing better with that particular move is the moment you gain the confidence to show that off in a competition, and your desire to continue to use that move increases because you worked so hard to get to that point.

Think and read through what Gwen Jorgensen said in her Hurdle podcast interview. Jorgensen was the first American woman to win Gold in the Olympic triathlon, so she knows a thing or two about working towards very high goals. She trained her mind to focus on the process and the time she is spending in training rather than the outcome of each training. Instead of wanting time to go by faster and training to be over, for example, she appreciates the process that she is enduring right now to get to the Olympics again next year.

When you achieve a goal, you can then set a new goal because you saw how you were able to endure the process to achieve your first goal, so you are motivated to keep getting better by setting a new goal.

When you make an accomplishment, think back on what helped you achieve that goal. What were some things that you were doing consistently to help you get there? How can you use that information to handle the next goal that you are setting?

Set process goals for yourself, too. Use these as building blocks to get to your overall goal. Each time you conquer a step, your confidence builds, and you can look back and appreciate the time that it took for you to get there.

Instead of wishing the time would go by faster, appreciate each experience that you are gaining. What is the opportunity?

Express gratitude for the process, and appreciate the time that you are getting to work on your goals. See what I did there? You are GETTING TO work on your goals.

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